Sick of having cash, cards, passports and various other things snatched from your bag? Perhaps you just know you can’t get by with what you have left, and prefer an extra level of safety for those times when you simply can’t keep everything on you. Let’s face it, no matter how safety conscious we are, there’s not really any way to be 100% safe on the road, unless you plan on only going swimming after you’ve locked every bit of cash away in the hotel safe. And that’s assuming the hotel safe is a reliable spot, and it isn’t always. One alternative way round this is the ‘hidden in plain sight’ method, and this particular stylized safe might be just the way to tuck away your valuables.

We apologize for filling your screen with their quite repulsive imagery , but these things actually have quite a lot going for them. Clearly, this is not somewhere that any thief is willingly going to hunt for your money, so short of snatching an entire bag, you’re unlikely to have any belongings hidden within your fake-stained jocks swiped. Each pair – we’ve only been able to track down male ones to date – comes with a 10″ x 4″ hidden compartment that can be Velcro-sealed inside this rather disgusting looking safe.

Amazingly, the ‘pattern’ design isn’t the full extent of the deterrents. Buy the deterrent safe to hide in your pack, and you’ll also be given a supply of smelly ‘Poo Drops’ to give your bag a matching, authentic smell. Are you prepared to go the full distance, making your entire bag smell like it’s been dragged through a sewer just to keep things safely stored? We’re not sure we’d go so far , but it might depend on the destination. I’d certainly consider it before a long distance bus journey over the notoriously dodgy Thailand/ Cambodia southern border, where thieves climb into the buses cargo hold and pick through bags with torches. Of course, simply keeping all your valuable safely locked up on your person might well be a more appetizing options. Since you asked, if you do want to access your money, the way in is through the fly.

The only downside is that all these visuals, smell-affects and hidden under-crevices come at a rather bulky $25 recommended retail price, and are more than a little hard to come across now that major stocker Diversion Safe seems to have lost interest and returned their focus to food cans and hidden holes in the wall. Still, if you can’t come across the retail set, there is one more option. You could always make your own? Yep, we can’t believe we said it, either…

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